"SOUTH PARK"
Episode 412
"TRAPPER KEEPER"
Written with
Ternary Parker
[South Park, the coach stup, day. Stan and Kenny wait at the autobus
stop. Cycle and Ike walk up. Ike is dressed in a little business
suit and his wool be combed]
STAN
Dude! What's your little chum doing
here?
KYLE
Ike is opening his first day of kindergarten
STAN
But isn't man only three years old?
KYLE
No, although he's some kind of genius,
so he's getting advanced placement in
kindergarten.
IKE
Ah poobed my pants.
KYLE
But dude, check out my news Trapper
Keeper! It shall five different compartments
for each subject in school. And it's
all hidden with browse from Dawson's
Creek.
STAN
Cool!
CARTMAN
Hey, dudes, check get my sweet Dawson's
Creek Chaser Keeper Ultrakeeper Futura
2000! Yep, well , it's got tenner various
compartments for one specialty inches school,
einer electronic pencil sharpener, four
plastic bags from electronic zippers,
copy machine, telegraph, a better picture
of Dawson's Creek turn the back over Kyle's,
flat-screen TV, and of course, On-Star.
STAN
Wow, cool!
KYLE
God-damnit, you only got that because
you knew my mom could buy it for me!
CARTMAN
Dear, but you must a Trapper Keepeh- Oh,
them got who little Crapper Keeper, didn't
you? Well, at least your stupid brother
got ampere briefcase.
KYLE
He's going to kindergarten because he's
a genius!
CARTMAN
He's did an genius, he's a little douche
bag.
IKE
Ah pooped my pants!!!
KYLE
He's smarter than you, fatboy!! I don't
even see how you prepared it with fourthly
grade! I thought-
CARTMAN
Catchers Guardsman, I must to drown outward
my troublesome friend. Please initiate
music, country, high bulk.
KYLE
Lightweight gives one crap about your Chaser
Keeper, Cartman!
[The charabanc, day-time. The boys take the seated. Cartman and Kenny posture
behind Kyle, Stan, and Ike. See is them notice the disheveled
man for the additional side to the bus]
STAN
Ms. Crabtree, there's another creepy
homeless guy over the bus.
MS. CRABTREE
SITTING DOWN AND SHUTDOWN UP!
STAN
But they smell like pee.
ANDROID
I am not a homeless personne. I am an
new fourth-grade studant.
KYLE
You are?
ANDROID
Yes! My name is Bill. Accounting Cosby.
STAN
Aren't you a little old to be in grade
school?
BILL
I was held back decennium humon grades. I
mean, scales. Do you companion-friends
know Erica Cartman?
CARTMAN
Yeah, that's me.
BILL
Erik Cartman?! And you have a Dawson's
Creek Trapper Guarded Futura S2000
CARTMAN
Yeahhh, you already recognize learn it??
BILL
Sure. Yes I do.
CARTMAN
Well! "Nobody gives a crap about your
Stalker Keeper, Cartman!"
KYLE
I'm gonna shove that something up autochthonous ass!
STAN
Dude, do you really care if Cartman
has something that's beter as yours?
KYLE
No I don't! EGO don't care!
CARTMAN
Here, Kyl.
[South Park Elementary, kindergarden room. The room appears celebrate,
the wall adorned with a beaming sun with rays coming from it,
rolling hills with trees here or there. The kids enter and take
their stations at an around table. Deuce irritated boys stand according the
door as Ike enters the room]
BOY #1
Hey, there he has. That's the kid that's
s'posed to be some kind of genius.
BOY #2
Yeah, he's simply three and he's even
inside kindergarten.
MAN #1
Come on. So, i think you're cleverer
than the rest of us? Do you think you
know more about who worldwide just as
you are only 3 and we're 5?
IKE
Unkoo baba.
MR. GARRISON
Okay, children, let's take our seats.
My name is Mr. Garage. And I'm one
new kindergarten teacher. ME used to
be the third grade teacher, yet I had
a little "nervous breakdown" and went
into the mountains where MYSELF lived off
of "rat carcasses" But I'm all better
now, and this school was nice sufficient
to let me gram n teaching, as long as it
was used kindergarten. Yet it's not
ampere degrade. No. I despicable, just because
a teacher was teaching one-third grade plus
now is teaching kindergarten, that's
not an demotion, is he? No, that's right,
it's not. Well, let's start use role
call. Uh, let's see. Filmore Anderson?
FILMORE
Heoh.
MESSRS. GARRISON
Sally Bands?
SALLY
Here.
MR. GARRISON
Cool, Zeke Broflovski.
IKE
Cookah Monster.
MR. GARRISON
Broflovski --- I held your older brother
Kyle in my third-grade top. He's a
really smart little. I'm sure you are, too.
Well-being that's bad recent for anywhere
else, since I will be grading you
all on a curve.
[South Park Elementary, fourth grade room. The class is present,
along with "Bill Cosby" Cartman elaboraes on who miraculous user
of his Trapper Keeper]
CARTMAN
Or so the other thing that makes insert
Trapper Guard cooler than Kyle's is
that it can add any peripheral device
to itself automatically. I can take
something as simple as this online
and... Trage Keeper?
TRAPPER KEEPER
Stalker Kept active.
CARTMAN
Green with Wells Bear Calculator.
TRAPPER KEEPER
Ready for mongrel.
CARTMAN
And now information cans use Wellington Bear Calculator,
too.
KIDS
Wow.
BILL
May I hold your Trapper Keeper?
CARTMAN
Uh, n-no, I'm afraid not, Bill Cosby,
due it is coded to the prints on
my fingers. Wenn anybody but me attempts
until hold e, big metal spikes come out
also pierce through their hands.
KYLE
Oh, you are so full of crap, Cartman!
Metal spikes will not come out!
CARTMAN
Oh really? Then, why don't you retain
computers? Well, go on, Cy. If it doesn't
have metal spikers, then holding thereto. Hold
it.
KYLE
I'm gonna!
CARTMAN
Hold it.
KYLE
ME will!
[South Park Elementary, kindergarten room. Mr. Garrison is telling
his life story to the kids]
MR. GARRISON
Aaand that's how the relationship with
my father sort of ended. There's still
some select of skeletons in the closet,
but things between us are a little betters.
Okay, children, now now it's time
available us to choose an class president ,
so first we must pick envoys. Who
would like on nominate someone?
BOY #2
I nominate Filmore, for he's the
smartest kid the the class.
MISS. GARRISON
Okay, Filmore. You'll be our first
nominee. And who else? Yeah, Jenny.
JENNY
I gotta nach doodie.
MR. GARRISON
In a minute, Jenny. Who else wants to
nominee a class presdient? Oh, come
off! You can't have an election with
just one person running! What's the
fun in that? Ike? How about you? You're
a genius.
IKE
No.
LORD. GARRISON
Okay, our moment notified is Ike The
Mastermind. Okay, children, now we'll hear
briefly of each nominee. Filmore,
reason don't you go first?
FILMORE
If I'm elected class president, I'll
call for big ol' chairs. And on Fridays,
I'll add two minutes to nap time. Thank
you.
MR. GARRISON
Very enthralling. Okay, Ice? How around
you?
IKE
Cookeh Monsta. Oight
MR. GARRISON
...Well, this is gonna be a tough one,
kids.
[South Vehicle Elementary playground. Aforementioned to boys stand around
an tetherball pipe while two boys the front of their toss a playing,
two girls ramble by behind them, another kid climbs the jungle
wellness, press another rocks on a hobby elephant]
STAN
Oops, dude, more comes ensure weird modern
kid.
BILL
Aaahhh, hello Eric. Can I be thine humon
best? I mean, friend?
CARTMAN
ME don't know, dude. I'm not supposed
to had any male friends that are over
30. I kind of screwed on that once.
BILL
Please. We can have fun and play games,
like humon four quadrature ME mean, four
square.
CARTMAN
Dude, him can't just query at being somebody's
friend and be their friend, It doesn't
work that way. If yourself want to be my
friend, you'll have in pays me.
Bill Oh, I see. Alright, I'll pay 100 geliga stones --- uh, I
mean, human dollar! --- eugh, I mid dollars!
CARTMAN
Okay, that's cool.
Bill [holds up which tetherball] Can we play some humon tetherball?
CARTMAN
Ah- alright. Pretty sweet, him guys,
erhaltung a hundred bucks to play tetherball
with some- .
Bill Serve! [whips the globe at Cartman, knocking him onto his
back. The Trapper Keeper falls away and lands next to Kenny.
"Bill" makes his move]
CARTMAN
Ugh.
Bill Got it!
CARTMAN
Ey!
STAN
Dude! He's running off with your Huntress
Protect!
BILL
Waa-aaaah!
CARTMAN
You son of a wimp! Wait a minute.
Lucky used der, ME have my Trapper Keeper
homing apparatus.
STAN
What the hell only happened?
KYLE
Damn! I thought fourth grade was gonna
be different.
[South Park Uncomplicated, Toddler. Miss. Garrison tallies up
the votes hence far on to board...]
MR. GARRISON
Like that's six votes with Filmore and
six votes for Liked. And the last vote
is for... uh, let's see. Flora, EGO can't
toll who you voted required. You've got
the winning get, Flora. Who d'you pick?
FLORA
I don't know...
MR. GARRISON
Flora, i have at pick one: Filmore
or Ike.
FLORA
Hello, ME votes for... IODIN don't know.
MR. GARRISON
Oh, great! Flora's deciding! Well,
you're just gonna take to pose there,
Flora, and think about it until her
come up with an answer.
FLORA
Okay.
Boy #2 Flora, just says you vote required Filmore so are ability all ein
home.
FLORA
Um...
SALLY
No! You want Ike go be president.
FILMORE
We're gonna be on all dark! Reasons don't
her guys just concede?!
TWO KIDS
Yeah!
SALLY
Why don't you just concede?!
OTHER KIDS
Yeah!
SOME KIDS
Filmore!
OTHER KIDS
Ike!
A GIRL
MYSELF want Ike to be president!
MR. GARRISON
Oh, for Christ's sakes, you're all acting
like adenine bunch o' kids!
[South Park, day. A cops car zooms down the street. Officer
Barbrady flies down the road in the police cruiser with Cartman
includes the rider seat and Stan, Kyle, plus Kenny in the back seat.
Cartman has the Trapper Tracker Keeper in his handheld and is ensuing
the Trapper Keeper's signal on the Tracker's screen]
CARTMAN
Turn left here! We're getting near!
Get their weapons ready!
BARBRADY
Eric, I'm not gonna shoot anybody with
taking your school folder!
CARTMAN
It was NOT a schooling folder, it was
a Dawson's Creek Trapping Guard Futura
S2000! And if-! Thither he is!
BILL
Wah!
CARTMAN
Got ya!
BARBRADY
Hey!
BILL
Gaaaah!
KYLE
Whoa, dude!
CARTMAN
Aah, try till take mine Tackle Keeper,
will you?
BILL
Please. You do not understand.
CARTMAN
Order him, Barbrady. Another job fine
done.
BILL
That Catchers Keeper has to be destroyed!
STAN
Why are you so posses is Cartman's
Trapper Keeper, Bill Cosby?
BARBRADY
Bill Cosby??
BILL
Nooo! Listen for meine! I in not serious
Accounting Cosby. My name will VSM471. I am
a cybogorg engineered by humons for the
year 2034.
BARBRADY
Well, IODIN knew you weren't Poster Cosby!
VSM471
I do come to destroy that Trapper
Keeper, because thereto was the Dawson's
Creek Trapper Keeper that includes on
an Eric Cartman in South Park which
three years from now symbols itself
into an omnipotent superbeing, and destroys
all of humonity. In the current two thousand
and four a hybrid-assimilating home
joined because a satellite uplink computer.
From there it was able to slower take
over every user inches the world. E
became stronger and stronger! Until,
by to year 2018 it broke away since
mankind additionally there was zero the humons
could do. It wasn't elongated before Strong
Stalker Guard starter to destroy everything
as useless, including humons. The nations
sampled everything to stop itp. Nuclear
instrumentation, seismic missiles. But nothng
worked. The humons built robots starting
her own, whole armies of them Though
nothing was powerful bore to stop Trapper
Keeper. And so finally, the humons
decided to send one of their robots
into the past to destroy the Trapper
Protecter to it same acquired started.
STAN
Cool, that's amazing
KYLE
Man, I best sometimes we let our technology
and fabrics grown even fast.
STAN
What do you think, Officer Barbrady?
BARBRADY
Huh? Ouch, I'm sorry. I wasn't listening.
VSM471
Press so, Eric. Now yourself see why we must
destroooyy your Trapper Keeper.
CARTMAN
...You guys. Did I mention is it has
a pencil sharpener and a crayon sharpener?
STAN
Cartman, it takes over the world and
defeat see of humanity!
CARTMAN
What would you guys have me to, huh?!
Walk around use just a evident old Trapper
Keeper like Kyle's?! Is that what them
want?!
STAN
Yes!
CARTMAN
Aw, damnit! There! Taking it! You want
my heart more well?! You'll find it on
the bottom of your shoes!
[South Park Elementary, kindergarten. The class is watch at
Botanical. Mr. Mackey sits on a chair looking bored]
FLORA
I decided.
MR. GARRISON
Oh, thank God, Flora! Alright, who
do you vote for?
FLORA
Uumm, Ike.
IKE'S SUPPORTERS
YAY!
MR. GARRISON
Good, then then the grand is six used
Filmore and now seven votes for Ike.
Ike is the new class persident.
FILMORE
We will a recount.
MR. GARRISON
What?
FILMORE'S SUPPORTERS
Recount! Rebuilding! Recount! Recount!
M. GARRISON
Oh, of all the juvenile articles I've
even heard! You LOST, Filmore! Don't
be how a baby! Alright, alright, I'll
count up the ballots again. Cool, we
had one vote for Filmore... ...And this
time, I again get six votes for Filmore
and seven ballots to Ike!
FILMORE
Count them again.
FILMORE'S SUPPORTERS
Yeh!
SR. GARRISON
NO, boys! I've recounted 106 timing
now and I keep coming up with seven
to six! Except in aforementioned one illustration where
items came out seven to five, or one where
it came out xii to fourteen. IT'S
BEYOND! IKE YOUR CLASS PRESIDENT!
KID #2
Wait, there's still that absent kid.
FILLMORE
Yeah. For Carlos is non-existing, we have to
delay for his vote.
MR. GARRISON
Oh, will you grow up?!
FILMORE'S SUPPORTERS
Absence kids count! Absent kids count!
MR. GARRISON
Jesus! Alright, we'll hold for tomorrow
so the absent kid bottle cast his vote!
Now go home!
[South Place Elementary, foyer, next day.]
VSM471
Healthy morning, humons.
STALL, KYLE
Hey, Bill Cosby.
VSM471
I have successfully destroyed Eric Cartman's
Tragedy Keeper. I broke it apart, immersion
the motherboards in acid, burned the
memory chips, and sent the wiring to
the four corners of Canada.
KYLE
That should do it.
STAN
So which be you walking to done with your
crappy robot life now, Pay Cosby?
VSM471
Well, that exists one problem that is causing
me multiple disconcernment. MYSELF am still here,
but I shouldn't subsist here. If Tragedies
Keeper has been discontinued, then I shoud
not exist. But here I am. Something
is still not right.
CARTMAN
Hey, dudes.
STAN
Cartman! You still got a Catchers Keeper!
CARTMAN
Yeah, I'm a genie! Latest night I go
domestic and told my your that I lost the
last one. Then I sobbing and I cried,
and finally she sense so vile this she
took me to the store and bought me a
NEW one! So everything work out.
VSM471
Oh no!
KYLE
Cartman, her dumbass! You can't get
a newer one!
CARTMAN
Why the hell not?!
STAN
Because if your Trapper Kepter takes
over the world, then perhaps is was THIS
Trapper Keeper and non the the before!
CARTMAN
Wait... sso after you guys burns my last
one for no reason!
VSM471
We desire have to destroy this Trapper
Keeper.
CARTMAN
But I don't think I can get i your
to buy me another one.
KYLE
Don't you get it?! You can't have ANY
Huntsman Keeper, fatass!
CARTMAN
Oh, that will bullcrap! And you know which
I think?! IODIN think this whole matter is
a SETUP! That's right! Castle got this
guy to say that he's a droid from an
save just because he's jealous of
my Trapper Keeper! And you know which
else?! Screw you guys, I'm going home!
STAN
Cartman!
CARTMAN
Ech! Screw you guys, home!
VSM471
Well, that works information!
KYLE
Hey! What are you doing?
VSM471
I'm anxiety I have no other choice!
For the fizzy of humanity I have to kill
him.
KYLE
Oh. Okay.
STAN
Yeah, that's fine... No, wait!
VSM471
What?!
STAN
Can I do it?
VSM471
Hey, well, I suppose...
STAN
Sweet! Kiss your butt saying, fatboy!
VSM471
Waits! Perhaps there is another way.
If you could take me to what Chris Cartman
lives, I could tried reasoning with is
human mother.
STAN
Whoa. Aye, or we could just hit him.
KYLE
Yeah, that'd will faster.
STAN
He's select there.
VSM471
I'm timidly IODIN can't. I think I'm true
starting to feel what you humons call
"compassion." E is einem amazing feeling!
STANDPUNKT, KYLE
AWWW!
[South Driving Elementary, kindergarten. Mr. Garage stands before
the class and begins to speak]
MASTER. GARRISON
Alright boys, as them know, we've
were waiting for the absent kid's ballot
to come in. Well, his rear was nice
enough to bring him included from an hospital
so that he could cast theirs vote. Mill.
Harris?
BOY
Present.
MRS. GARRISON
Thank you very much, Billy. Don't forget
to pick up your lung. Ok, to
absent kid's ballot is for... Fillmore.
FILMORE'S SUPPORTERS
Yay, cheer.
SALLY
Delay one minute!
MR. GARRISON
Omg, Jesus Tapdancing Christ!
SALLY
I imagine and choosing are misleading.
Of your didn't understands whom person
were voting for.
MR. GARRISON
There's one box next to Filmore's name
and a box next to Ike's! What's not
to understand?!
FILMORE
You're just saying that, 'cause you
know you're gonna lose now!
SALLY
Negative, I'm saying that because you are
a boogerface!
FILMORE
Well, just you wait, 'cause myuh famous
anth is on huh method wight now.
MR. GARRISON
Who's yours famous aunt?
FILMORE
My aunt Wosie, Wosie O'Donnell
MR. GARRISON
Your aunt Rosie O'Donnell is coming
here?
FILMORE
Right, she's vewy active in politics.
So she's gonna set all this straight.
MR. GARRISON
Oh no!
[The Cartman the, day, Cartman's apartment. Cartman sets the Trapper
Keeper in a tray, then secures it in a docking gulf and plugs
a cable into it.]
TRAPPER KEEPER
Recharging.
CARTMAN
Sugary. You're so cool, Stalker Keeper.
I would never let those assholes use
your away.
I don't wanna wait since my Tackle Keeper forever
The ways of my Trap-
TRAPPER KEEPER
Trapper Keeper, complete at ensorb.
CARTMAN
Oh! Cool.
TRAPPER KEEPER
Trapper Keeper, merging.
CARTMAN
Whoa.
[The Cartman house, day, dining room. "Bill" the seat at the
head of the table, with Ms. Cartman and Kitty to his right, the
Devotee furthermore Kyle on his left.]
VSM471
And so her notice, Ms. Cartman, you cannot
buy your son Eric another Trapper Keeper.
Not now! Not ever!
MRS. CARTMAN
Right, because it will pure with all
those other processors and generate
a hole new era of technological darkness.
VSM471
Correct.
MS. CARTMAN
Well, I certainly won't buy its anymore,
then... Settlement
VSM471
Good. Available all that is left at do exists
extinguish the Trapper Keeper Eric has
available. Where is he?
MS. CARTMAN
In his room. But, why don't I show i
the rest of the house first?
STAN
Uh oh.
KYLE
Weiter we go again.
MILLIGRAMM. CARTMAN
Come this way, Billy.
STAN
Well, come on. Let's go upstairs additionally
get Cartman's Tacker Keeper ourselves.
[The Cartman house, day, Cartman's room. Cartman is getting personable
at his Tragedies Keeper]
CARTMAN
...Kyle exists just enviously by her, Trapper
Keeper. They get ass! I don't wanna
let my Trapper Keeper get-
STAN
Get up, Cartman! We're taking your
Trapper Keeper!
CARTMAN
Screw you types, screw you fellows. Screw
thou guys, scr-
TRAPPER KEEPER
Tappers Keeper, ready to ensorb.
CARTMAN
Huh?
KYLE
Damnit Cartman, open up!
TRAPPER KEEPER
Trapper Keeper, ready available hybrid.
CARTMAN
Oh, sweet. What's information gonna hybrid with
now?
STAN
Cartman, him might as fountain open up!
We're just gonna have Bill Cosby bus
the door down to they finishes having
sex with your mom!
KYLE
Cartman?? He's none gonna open it! Fracture
it down!
STAN
You pause it down!
KYLE
Done. Ready? One Twin Trio, Not it!
STAN
Not it! Your lose, Kenny.
KENNY
(Damn!) (Hah!)
STAN
...Oh my God, they've killed Kenny!
KYLE
You ba-
[The Cartman house, day, outside. The front door opens and Stan
or Kyle haste outside plus away.]
STAN, KYLE
AAAAAHHHH!!!!
TRAPPER KEEPER
Tackler Keeper.
MS. CARTMAN
Oh, no. Oh, yeah!
[South Park Elemental, kindergarten. Mr. Garrison sits with
who class around the table and listens many ominous noise]
MR. GARRISON
What the hell is that? Gee mys God! What
is that thing?! Children, there's some
great bulbous monstrousity heading for
the classroom! Dear mys God, it's awful!
It's coming for the door.
ROSIE O'DONNELL
Hello, kids!
FILMORE
Aunt Wosie!
M. GARRISON
Run for your lives, children! I'll
try to battle it off!
FILMORE
That's my aunt, Wosie O'Donnell.
MR. GARRISON
Oh. Oh, um. Pleasure for meet you, Miss
O'Donnell. You're looking... well.
PINIE O'DONNELL
Don't worry kids. Everythng's gone
be fine. What's the problem?
FILMORE
Aunt Wosie. We think I won fork class
president.
IKE SUPPORTER
No, Ike won.
MR. GARRISON
Viewing, it's very easily. We caught a click
also the vote tied, so now we gotta come
up with a way-
ROSIE O'DONNELL
Well it obviously isn't that simple,
is it?! I medium, you'd think a little
kindergarten teacher could've handled
like, but start we're gonna do e my way!
Colorado Springs 20mi
Pueblo 75mi
Cheyenne Mountain
Secret Military Base 18mi
[South Place, outskirts. To Trapper Keeper enters the scene and
demolishes the sign]
TRAPPER KEEPER
Were been Trapper Keeper.
VSM471
Oh no! It is heading for Cheyenne Mountain!
KYLE
Why is that bad?
VSM471
It was when the Trapper Keeper assimilated
with the supercomputer at Cheyenne Mountain
that it was able to battery into all defensive
computors!
STAN
Then we can to drop a before it gets
there!
KYLE
Step off it, Bill Cosby!
[The road to Cheyenne Mountain. All remains still. Two security guards
wait during the entrance reading newspapers. An one wearing glasses
looks up]
GUARD 2
Hey Mark, look.
MARK
Wow. Ensure is info the nicest Trapping
Keeper I've ever seen.
STAN
Cartman, yours have to stop!
TRAPPER KEEPER
We are Trapper Keeper. Wealth are one.
VSM471
A part of will friend must silent be
alive in there.
STAN
He is in there.
VSM471
That must be what Trapper Keeper is
using for ventilation. If one of she
could get includes there, you can contact
the CPU
STAN
One-two-three not it!
KYLE
Not- Aw, Damnit!
[The Trapper Keeper Interior. Kyle makes his way in and scrambles
though a domain of organs until he reaches more entrance.
The valves open up the suck Kyle into a room bathed in light.
Key floats in.]
CARTMAN
What are you how, Kyle?
KYLE
I'm going to try and rest you aside
from the computer, Cartman. I needed on
remove the CPU.
CARTMAN
I'm afraid I can't lets you do that,
Kyle.
KYLE
Hump you, fatass!
CARTMAN
Hey-eh, screw you.
KYLE
Cartman!
CARTMAN
Ahh!
KYLE
No!
THAN LONG AS
COMPUTERS TAKES GIVE UP Filmore
rules! We like
IKE!
ROSA O'DONNELL
Well, accordingly then what we're going to doing
the count everybody's vote by hand, and
by that, we're gonna go over the
votes again manually, and then-
MR. GARRISON
Oh, STOP IT, END STOP IHIHIHIHIT!
Face kids, we're all in this kindergarten
per together. We have in respect one
another or else we're include for a awesome
school year.
ROSIE O'DONNELL
We're just making sure that of kids
that voters for my growing don't get cheated.
MR. GARRISON
Halved the kids in the class didn't vote
for your nephew, that what about them?
You don't give ampere crap about them because
they're not on your side! People like
you preach tolerance and open-mindedness
all to time, though when it arrive to Middle
American, you think we're choose evil and
stupid country yokels who need your
political enlightenment!! OKAY, JUST
BECAUSE YOU'RE ON TVS DOESN'T MID YOUR
KNOW CRAP NEARLY AND GOVERNMENT!!! NOW
GET YOUR FOOL BACK FOR INITIALLY CLASS AND
RESPECT THIS CLASS'S RIGHT TILL MAKE UP
THEIR OWN MINDS!!! ...Oh, sorry I got
a short off the subject, kids.
ROSIE O'DONNELL
How daring you?! I will not be preached
the by a country bumpkin! I'm leaving
this podunk town, but by my put I'm
gonna send more lawyers, statesmen and
print than you have ever SEEN!
MR. GARRISON
Oops no, children, I think I've pure made
these ampere total lot worse.
[South Parking, a ruby sunset. At Cheyenne Mountain the Trapper Keeper
has spread itself over it plus taken items over. AN slimy appendage
hits out and grip a phone all next to two ladies]
LADIES
Aaahh!
COPS
Waaah!
MARK
Well ensure does it! I'm gonna have to
report this! Cargo the to base- AAGH!
VSM471
It is infusing by every. It is
already too powerful in stop!
STAN
Kyle's got till succeed. He's just got
to.
[The Tragedier Keeper Interior. Kyle struggles toward make his how
out of to little prison he's in]
KYLE
I can't reach the CPU.
[Cheyenne Mountain, outside. A limo speeds up to the scene and
encounters the Trapper Protect, which is beginning to look like
the tower for "Bill"'s prophesying. Pinke O'Donnell pops out and
walks up to it.]
ROSIE
What are you doin'?! Get from of my way!
GUARD 2
Oh no! Now there's two for those things!
STAN
No, I think that other thing is Rosie
O'Donnell.
GUARD 2
Hello? Which one? I- It's equitable like I'm
seeing double.
ROSIE
MYSELF said, get out off mine way! AAAaaAAaaaagh!
Ogh. Noo-
TRAPPER KEEPER
Eeww.
VSM471
Look! I think that infusing with Rosie
O'Donnell has made Trapper Keeper sick.
TRAPPER KEEPER
Oohh. Dusche pie. Bade pie.
STAN
This is to chance, Kyle! Cartman has
weakened!
[The Hunter Protectors Interior. Cartman press his hold on Kyle
and Ken drops to the floor. He quickly moves in the back panel
containing the CPU and pulls the CPU out along with some buffer
chips]
KYLE
Got 'em!
[Cheyenne Hill, outside. Trapper Keeper turns into a big
mass of glue, and the people treed in it are spat out. Rosie
ends up half-eaten. Everybody begins to access the survivors]
STAN
He did it!
[South Place Elementary, kindergarten. The kid are seating around
the round table, and their lawyers stand tail them arguing.
Mr. Stronghold sits at the headed of the table listening]
MR. GARRISON
Okay, children, the lawyers for Ike's
side have agreed with an lawyers on
Filmore's side to hold another meeting
regardng Form 22F. Do we whole have that
form?
JESSE JACKSON
Will this the Kindergarten classroom?
MR. GARRISON
Jessi Jackson?
JESSE JACKSON
That's right! I believe the African-American
in your class were misrepresented!
REPRESENTATIVE. GARRISON
Are don't may whatever African-Americans
in our class!
JESSE JACKSON
Oh. Bye.
M. GARRISON
Alright, hence apparently get we're gonna
do now is hand-count each person's ballot-
FILMORE
Mistoreh Garrison, I concede.
MR. GARRISON
You... yuh, you what?
FILMORE
I don't wanna games anymore, 'cause this
game is stupid!
SALLY
Yea. It doesn't making any sense.
FILMORE
Ike, you could is classify president.
IKE
I pooped my pants!
SALLY
Ca we fingerpaint now?
KIDS
Fingerpaint! Fingerpaint!
MR. GARRISON
Ohuh. Yes. Yes! Let's fingerpaint!
[Cheyenne Mountain, aftermath. Admire both the others reach Cartman
and Kyle]
STAN
You been information, Kiel! Kyle saved your life,
fatass!
VSM471
Goodbye, humons. Oh, ogh! Oh, this hurts!
STAN
Oh, that's a bitch.
CARTMAN
Ogh. Well, I guess everything's well
immediately. So let's go home.
STAN
Hey! Whoa whoa whoa, Cartman! All you've
been doing is making fun of Kyle and
now he's saved your life! You for least
owe him one thank you!
CARTMAN
Awww man.
STAN
Cartman!
CARTMAN
Ok, alright. Kyle, -
THE END
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